A Girl Named Sylvia... Part 2 - The Good, The Bad & The Reality

As I said in yesterday's post, Sunday was the most difficult day I have ever had on the bike. Mentally as much as physically. My goal was to ride 60 miles, but I was pulled at 45. It wasn't my body that let me down, it was my head. When I was told "Get in the Fuckin Car", I was relieved, but that relief quickly turned to anger. I knew I had given up instead of putting my head down and fighting. The car ride back to Little Rock was awkwardly quiet. I knew the man sitting in the passenger seat, who I will refer to in this post as "LadyKiller" was disappointed and probably pissed. He had just spent 5 hours driving behind me at 8 miles per hour while I rode the trail and I gave up on him and myself. He knew it before I did, which is why he called it off. The awkward silence slowly gave away to a discussion of the days events. There were positives, only a few, and negatives, but it was not a failure. This ride was a benchmark. I now know what must be accomplished in two weeks when I go back and I certainly know what riding Leadville will require.

The Good

My body did not give up on me. It was 105 degrees while I was riding and my legs stayed strong, never cramped. Looking back today, I'm blown away that I could even complete what I did on Sunday. It's only been 3 months since I had my final cast removed. I've definitely come a long way physically. At about nine miles in, "LadyKiller" stopped me and gave me some technical advice about climbing. I was riding these early climbs in to easy of a gear, which was causing me to bounce up and down on the seat. This was, "wasted energy" he told me. "Bring it up a gear or two, find a rhythm and stick with it". This advice proved to be very useful. I immediately noticed a big difference in my climbing. It was smoother and I was able to keep myself and the bike under control, which allowed me to concentrate on my pedal stroke and the lines I was taking on the hill. Finally, if there is ever a water drinking contest, I will win...hands down. I think I will have the words "The Camel" pinstriped on my bike. I consumed seven liters of water during the forty mile ride, that has to be a record. Told you the "Good" was short, but that's okay.

The Bad

My head. I was defeated before the ride even started. I think "LadyKiller" even knew it. While we were driving to Sylvia he looked over and told me to relax. I'm still wondering as I write this how he knew. I knew going in that these would be steep climbs, I just underestimated their length. They seemed to go on forever and with each one I got more frustrated. I allowed my brain to tell my body that it wasn't possible. I allowed myself to feel defeated instead of just accepting the climbs and taking them as they came. At mile 37, I cracked. I hopped off the bike and declared I was finished. I was using every excuse possible...the heat, my leg, you name it. LadyKiller got back into the car, locked the doors, cracked the window and told me to clip my ass back onto the bike and get going. I knew he was serious and that if i didn't get back on he would have left my ass for the vultures. I got back on and continued. I finished the final three miles back to the car and mentally quit. When he announced it was time for another twenty miles I cringed. I clipped back in and took off, about 100 yards into the trail he pulled up to me and asked what was the problem? Is this guy a psychic? I think I must have answered him with my classic smart ass tone, because it was at that moment he told me "Get in the Fucking Car". He knew it would have been a waste, I knew I wasn't mentally prepared.

The Reality

I can train day after day for the next five months, but if I can't get mentally tough, it will be all for nothing. I must believe in myself and my physical ability. "LadyKiller" told me in the car ride home, "You know how to eat an elephant?, One bite at a time". I really like that quote. It made me realize that I just need to relax and not to freak out at the big picture, just settle down and take each obstacle one at a time.

To the dismay of "LadyKiller", I did get a few pics of the ride, so enjoy.